Milica Clayton: Living and Learning

A person’s life is like a book. Interwoven chapters encapsulate unique narratives describing the choices one makes, big or small, every step of the way.

Milica Clayton’s life is a rich collage packed with heartening chapters of positive learning in her past 42 years. Her book of life is still a work-in-progress because there’s so much more to look forward to as her journey continues.

A list of the many roles she plays is impressive enough: executive coach, customer experience expert, talent spotter and nurturer, career sounding board, problem solver, voracious reader, fitness enthusiast, lifelong learner as well as wife, mom, daughter, sister, colleague and friend.

But what is more impressive is her evolution into a nurturing, compassionate person who draws others to seek her company or advice, professionally and personally.

“You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step,” Milica quotes Martin Luther King as a long-held personal belief.  Thus, she has fashioned her life across Serbia where she is from, Greece and the United Arab Emirates working in diverse industries – banking, construction, airlines, home improvement, designer luxury, jewellery and cosmetics for brands such as Emirates, IKEA and Chanel.

“If there’s one thing I am passionate about, it is Growth,” she says.  She takes it all in and gets emotional listening to people she has nurtured on-the-job introduce themselves and describe their career progression.  Likewise, she reflects on where she has come from and the challenges she overcame which help her to navigate life.

Milica Simovic at 2 years old in Serbia

“When I was 12 years old, my family was in a terrible car accident,” Milica recalls. “We came out alive, but it had serious consequences for all of us.” 

Her father suffered significant injuries that forced Milica to assume the role of caregiver with a steep acceleration to grow up.  In her teen years, her brother was diagnosed with severe mental illness. Milica worked as her father’s right hand person in a construction business from the age of 18.  Meanwhile, her mother, who had her own business, had to shut it down around the time of the 2008 economic crisis. Her parents eventually divorced. 

Milica looks back at her family situation as character forming.  “At age 7, I still didn’t know how to read and write, had no friends, and was always pushed away. But I was stubborn and determined and forged ahead to catch up and overcame the bullying.” 

Acceptance of the stark reality earlier in life only strengthened her determination to create a new path, not just one but a few paths, for herself. 

Posing for a photographer friend in New York; a photo that has found commercial value

She was working in a local bank in Serbia in her mid- to -late twenties. To financially support her family she knew that she would have to make a big career change, so she took a cabin crew job with Emirates airlines in the UAE despite her fear of flying. 

“I really went up against my fear! It was a terrible first flight, but I did it!”  Milica reminisces.

On an Emirates flight with Jessica, a friend and former colleague

On a layover in South Africa, Milica was at a low point so she went to a bookstore to get a pick-me-up book. Entitled “The Fairy Godmother’s Guide to Getting What You Want” the cover had a smiling young lady holding a magic wand.  This caught her eye and she devoured the anecdotes, case studies and exercises. 

“It had so many lessons for me – about mind-body-soul alignment, about manifesting and receiving…” she says. The book is emblematic of Milica’s journey. Whenever she finds herself at a critical point in her life, she opens herself up to signs and acts on the messages and learning she receives.

The book nudged her to adopt a more positive outlook toward her environment and circumstances, whether she might find herself having breakfast by a hotel swimming pool, on board a long haul trip or doing regular exercise. 

After four years of flying with Emirates, Milica happened to meet a group of people who worked at IKEA. 

“I guess, I exuded a positive energy as I openly discussed wanting a change.  I walked away with one person’s business card.  Before I knew it, I was interviewing for a job, (and bought books to prepare!).  On the last day of my Emirates job, who should be on the flight from Zurich but the gentleman from IKEA who was hiring me!  I used to see thousands of passengers a week and very rarely the same person within the same week, and there he was!  For me, it was a confirmation that I was making the right move.”

It was a move that had her grow with the company for eight years.  IKEA wanted to emulate Emirates’ renowned customer service and Milica’s inflight cabin experience was a perfect fit.  She led and supported the opening of new stores, tried new formats, assembled new teams, spotted talent and nurtured people to bigger roles.  It was incredibly fulfilling.

She also took the initiative to develop herself more and read voraciously, penning her own book reviews, which she posted on LinkedIn.  These titles, and what Milica says about these books, caught my attention:

Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi – “Use every opportunity to meet and connect with people. Lunch or coffee is the perfect time… The relationships only get stronger the more we use them.”

The Looooooooooong Game by Dorie Clark – “Remind ourselves how far we have already come, and find a way to reflect, so that we can see the rest of the journey in front of us.”

The Coaching Habit – Say Less, Ask More and Change the Way you Lead Forever by Michael Bungay Stanier – “One great question is ‘How can I help?’ This powerful question encourages people to make a direct request and stops you from thinking that you know how best to help and leap into action.”

The Culture Map by Erin Meyer – “Have you ever been left confused by someone’s actions at the same time even seen them as rude and inappropriate?  Most of the time it turns out to be nothing more than a cultural difference.  Once we are able to understand those differences we tend to judge less…”

I sense that Milica has imbued the wisdom from all these books from the one-hour conversation I had with her. 

Aside from books, she subscribes to David Stachowiak’s ‘Coaching for Leaders’ and enrolled in his Coaching for Leaders Academy.  “What a journey that was, filled with discomfort, vulnerability, joy and happiness,” Milica says about the course.

Two years ago, Milica came across a LinkedIn post of Agneta Olsson, also from IKEA, who was leaving the company to do coaching and leadership development full time.  Agneta seemed to be at a very interesting crossroads, which sparked Milica’s curiosity so she reached out, and subsequently, enrolled in the five-week Women of the World (WOW) coaching programme.

During the programme, Milica remembered how powerful and important visualisations are for goal setting.  She was introduced to her “inner critic” and learned an amazing way to approach her.  She also discovered what she is passionate about, what gets her into flow, and what is her true calling.

Milica connected deeply with WOW founder Isa Buencamino.  The connection almost felt “spiritual” as everything Isa was saying resonated so much. 

With WOW Founder Isa Buencamino

“Direct your confidence into commitment, rather than a goal,” Isa advised.  To which Milica declared, “I am committed to People, to Growth.” This is where she finds the most energy and this has become the lens that inspires her to see and do things differently.

“If I have a superpower, as my close friend said, it would be to see talent in people, something they may not see in themselves. I then highlight and nurture it.”

A lifelong learner, Milica also enrolled in a professional coaching course with Teleos Leadership Institute and is working toward her ICF (International Coaching Federation) accreditation.  People seem to gravitate to her for career or personal advice. She is a generous listener with natural coaching skills.

In her current new corporate role as Client Care Manager in a global fashion power house, Milica is piloting a new customer experience department, hiring new people, building a team, understanding the industry, getting stakeholders on board, earning trust – all in a short period of time.  “It’s like raising your hand and then you get called and you think did I raise my hand too quickly?”  she chuckles.  “Deep inside I know I can do it.  It’s exciting and I’m up for it!”

Wedding in Serbia in 2017

Celebrating with family and friends

At home, Milica is picking up lessons from her husband, Dan, and two children: a 6-year-old girl and 4-year-old boy.  “My husband came from a harmonious family and I watch him do things naturally, instinctively.”  He says Milica is a wonderful mother, but she claims parenting takes more effort and is not instinctive for her because of her troubled family background. 

“There are certain situations that trigger me,” Milica reflects.  She notices these and they become deep insights which she learns from.

Milica recalls how she met a psychologist for a work related matter.  “I talked about trouble with my daughter’s tantrum expecting to hear some tricks and tools.  Instead she looked at me and said, ‘At this age they don’t know what is happening to them and can’t control their behaviour… But we can choose the way we look at tantrums and choose how to react.  We are the adults and should be mindful of our reactions and help them deal with emotions in the best possible way.’”

This young mother appreciates 360-degree learning, even from her children. 

With husband Dan, daughter Mia and son Noah

Milica lives by the philosophy “How you speak about other people speaks loudest about yourself” (quoted from Bear Grylls, a British trooper, survival expert and television presenter). 

Filled with compassion, she continues: “It makes me always put myself in other people’s shoes.  After so many years I have learned so much, I have so much knowledge and tools and feel compelled to share these.  When I see young people make mistakes, I know they still don’t have the right tools. I think of myself at their age and remember how inexperienced I was. I also think of mistakes that older parents have made and realise that they, too, were not equipped with the tools to figure things out.”

Milica has worked for 24 years and the more recent jobs play to her strengths and passions. She has a lot of energy for her multiple roles. “If I find I have an extra 20 minutes or an hour in between appointments, I do some strength training or go for a run, or I pick up something new about nutrition or healthy living. I like setting a good example.”

Milica doesn’t look back at her past with any sadness or regret.  All experiences count in shaping her into what she is today.  Her focus on continuous learning and other people’s growth, as well as her own, will undoubtedly add many more hats to the ones she already wears.   

In her own words: “All I need to do is lift my head and see all the opportunities.”

Roxanne | ws

Images c/o Milica Clayton | LinkedIn: Milica Clayton | FB: Milica Clayton |IG @mica_prepelica_